Hail is single-handedly taking Terrible Two's to a whole new level. He's only 28 months old, I have to remind myself daily. I can out-smart him. I can win. "I WILL win!" I say to him, sometimes, as we battle out temper-tantrums over extra cookies or staying in the bed for naptime. Sad thing is, I don't always win. He's just so.... so.... unbridled. Bert often says he's like a young Squanto, who was plucked straight from history and plopped into our house in the 21st century. The child is a nut. The following will help to prove my case:
One morning while changing out the liner in the kids' bathroom, I noticed the bag seemed a little wet. It didn't surprise me, because my kids are always playing in the sink, then making a huge watery mess, covering the entire bathroom. Later that same day, Hail was doing his "business" on the toilet when Lightning decided he had to go "tee-tee" and refused to go to the other bathroom. I listened in as a small feud began.
Lightning: MOVE! I gotta go NOW!
Hail: Go to Momma's baf-room!
Lightning: Nooooooo! I wanna go to dis baf-room!
Hail: Well, I'm goin' poo-poo. Just use dat trash can. Dat's what I do sometimes.
Me, interrupting: What did I just hear you say?
Hail, proud as punch with a HUGE grin on his face: Yep... I does dat... Sometimes... I do, but dat's okay Momma, you not get mad at me.
I don't even know if the monkeys at the zoo would claim him.